What Adoptive Parents Want Birthmothers to Know

Even though open adoption means there is a certain openness, there are often some things that are left unsaid. Birthmothers and adoptive parents have many feelings, fears, and desires they may be too afraid, shy, or embarrassed to share. Here are some things adoptive parents want birthmothers to know.

You are a part of our life.

Some adoptive parents choose open adoption because they feel it’s the best option for their child. They want to have a relationship with their child’s birthmother, but what they want the most is for their child to know who his or her birthparents are and how much they were loved.

You are a part of our family.

You’re not a traditional family, but you’re a family nonetheless. Love for your child is what connects you. Adoptive parents know that a birthmother will never stop loving her child. That’s why you’ll always share that special connection.

You have changed our life.

A birthmother will always have a special place in the hearts of adoptive parents. They know that a birthmother gave birth to their child, and that has changed their lives in a most wonderful way. They will always be grateful for the opportunity to become parents.

I understand why you chose to place your baby for an adoption.

Adoptive parents know that adoption is an ultimate sign of love. When a birthmother chooses adoption, she puts her child’s needs above her own and shows she wants only what’s best for her child. Adoptive parents understand and respect this wholeheartedly.

I became a parent because of you.

When a birthmother chooses the family she wants to place her child with, it involves an extraordinary amount of trust. Adoptive parents will never forget that birthmother is the one who gave them the opportunity to become parents. They understand they would not be parents if not for their birthmother’s ultimate gift.

I know that you did not give your child up.

Adoptive parents understand that making an adoption plan for her baby in no way means a birthmother has given up or abandoned her baby. It’s quite the opposite in fact. Adoptive parents know that a birthmother has decided to place her child up for adoption because she wants him or her to have a loving and caring family.